10.01.2008

The Importance of Learning Something From Everyone

It has been said that "A wise man learns from his mistakes".

Naturally a wiser man learns from the mistakes of others.

There is however a more important concept than looking at the mistakes of others, and learning what NOT to do. The greater truth is that if we are hungry to learn we just might be able to learn What To Do which, if we can discipline ourselves trumps learning What Not To Do.

I think that there is a quote that basically says "In life, you will get results comparable to the people you surround yourself with". (That is a lousy attempt at the quote, so if someone finds the quote, please let me know! I did look for the quote, but after 30 minutes of searching for it unsuccessfully, I got distracted and suckered into taking an online IQ test - that then required me to subscribe $20 per month just to get my test score - which I did'nt pay - and all I proved is that I don't have a quote, and that my IQ must be pretty pathetic.)

Another similar quote: "It is not WHAT you know but WHO you know." Perhaps this blog may demonstrate that it is not solely who you know, but also WHO WE LEARN FROM.

Think about it. Suppose you grow up surrounded by gang members & drug dealers. Statistically it is highly likely you will become one, and either serve time, get shot, or something bad will happen. Conversely, suppose you grow up going to a private school where everyone graduates high school and gets a 4 year degree in college. Statistically you would be highly likely to achieve the same outcome.

Naturally there are remarkable stories of individuals who, despite their own life's circumstances and upbringing, defy the odds and go on to achieve greatness. We could look at hundreds of examples... from Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln, Warren Buffet, all the way to Daddy Warbucks (You know... the self-made millionaire, whose shaven head and affection for the curly red-headed orphan Annie proved to all of us how great he was!)

I am confident however that in each such remarkable story, there was a desire to LEARN and grow... and that an extensive interview with such remarkable individuals would demonstrate that they learned critical lessons from their humble beginnings, and also went about their lives seeking additional learning opportunities from others.

Wasn't Albert Einstein the first guy to say, "I know that I don't know". Being aware of our own lack of knowledge is one part of an important equation to growth, but a desire to learn from others is a second, probably more important one.

Nothing can be as frustrating as being surrounded by those that believe they know everything. My brother Dave does a "bit" about a guy who knows everything - even before you tell him. Surely we have all experienced a such a conversation. It is remarkable to realize how stuck these individuals are. (Maybe some to some that know me better, I am just such an individual... I hope not!)

Allow me to present a formula that I have found to be valuable in learning from others:
  1. WATCH & LISTEN. Allow myself to observe what is taking place.
  2. THINK. Sounds like a novel concept, right? Consider the perspective of the individuals I am observing. (Include Myself)
  3. ASK QUESTIONS. This may include literally asking the other person "Why did you do that?" or "What is it you would like me to understand from your request?". Asking question may also come later in introspection... "How did that person know to do ___________?" or "How did that person react when _________" and so on...
  4. CONCLUDE & TAKE ACTION. Sometimes learning can be a guessing game, but take the lesson the best you can understand it, and put it into action. Taking Action includes things like writing it down, talking with someone about the thing you learned or observed, setting a goal to duplicate a pattern, or deciding to manage your time better, etc.
  5. PRACTICE. Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly, at first... and worth doing well after practicing.
In many ways, the very blog you are reading is just that... perhaps the only value being rendered is to me, the author... but it is valuable to me. I find myself not only putting many principles I write about into action, but am constantly on the lookout for things I can learn and write about.

Imagine that if you put this principle to use, what a collection you would have after some practice.

  • What I learned from my Mom: Don't be afraid of who you are, because everyone else might be... LOL! I can talk to any one at any time about anything, and I never have to be afraid.
  • What I learned from my Dad: No matter how bad things get, it won't last. No matter how good things get, it won't last. Don't quit. Tell the truth. Work hard. Put your family first.
  • What I learned from Jarvis Webb: People do what benefits them, first.
  • What I learned from Brandon Osborne: Don't let anybody push you around. Who cares if you get beat... you will command respect and respect yourself if you stand up.
  • What I learned from Jimmy Dunn & Family: What true friendship is. How to love people, no matter what. How to see the best in everyone we meet. I learned that I was worth loving.
  • What I learned from Matt Kennedy: How to talk to women. How to find humor in everything.
  • What I learned from Ed Scholz: Just do what I am supposed to do, and who cares about everybody else. Everybody is imperfect, even the ones who think they are perfect. I learned what I hope Heavenly Father is like.
  • What I learned from Louis Scholz: Don't get myself dirty, or I will regret it. Stay clean.
  • What I learned from Daron: You can never do a good deal with a bad guy.
  • What I learned from Dan, Jay, Dave & Marion, Kenny & Amber, others: Forgiveness & Mercy.
  • What I learned from Cameron Foster: Believe in people. Believe in who they are. It helps them be their best.
  • What I learned from Bryan Miller: I had to learn true friendship again. It doesn't matter where you come from, what matters is where you are going. You can accomplish a lot, with very little effort simply be deciding to do it.
  • What I learned from Bryce Blanchard: Be the best at what you do, The Best. Every positive has a negative, and every negative has a positive... and you have to see both before you are even in the game. Hold your cards, aka keep your mouth shut. Negotiating.
  • What I learned from Spencer Hunn: Never stop believing in what you do. Be a good person. Never stop doing what you do best.
  • What I learned from My Wife: Love. Patience. Service. Charity. Laughter is the most beautiful sound on earth. Don't do dumb things to distance myself from the people I love, or I will feel lousy about it. Not every problem has to be solved on my schedule. I have a very long way to go!
  • What I learned from My Children: There is a God, and he loves each of us... personally and individually. No one is forgotten.
I could go on forever, and so could you. Now: Let's PRACTICE!

Please write me and let me know a lesson you have learned from someone, that pops into your mind... or anything else. Make your own list.

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